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“A Barbarian in a Heatwave”

Posted on August 14, 2024 by admin

This article is based on this dutch article of Martijn Benders

Barbaar in een hittegolf

Currently, Italy is experiencing one of the worst heatwaves in history. I’m typing this in Venice, after the second sweltering night where it didn’t cool down below 25 degrees. Still, I have no regrets about coming here—I’m doing it, of course, for my daughter Mavi, who had always wished to see Italy. I would have preferred going to Tuscany, but it became Venice, a city I last visited 48 years ago.

Of course, we wanted to visit the Biennale. And we did that yesterday, despite the heat.


The Biennale was fantastic! Veronique was initially worried that it would all be too “woke” in a problematic way, but if you were to call this woke, it’s exactly the right kind: excelling art from different cultures, no longer dominated by that overbearing Western narrative, which is precisely what the problematic kind of woke at the Van Abbe Museum represents. Showing the best from other cultures too…what a trippy art experience this was, truly a beautiful experience.

However, with Italians, there’s something about formality. It was so hot that my t-shirt was soaked, so I took it off because walking around in a wet shirt is unhealthy. No one at the Biennale had a problem with it, but as soon as I set foot in a smaller gallery outside, I encountered “il frustrino,” who didn’t speak a word of English but had a huge issue with a shirtless barbarian. The same happened on the ferry. “Il Frustino” kept shouting at me until I pulled my shirt out of my bag and put it back on.

‘Are they that religious here?’ Mavi asked me. I don’t know if this has anything to do with religion or if it’s an Italian thing.

Meanwhile, I received another email from the Dutch Foundation for Literature. For the fourth time in a row, they want to place someone from the “executive tier” in the role of literary expert. I calculated with Wolfram how likely it is to pick four executive members out of a group of 700 writers and 300 executives in a row: that chance is roughly 0.7 percent. This suggests that it’s highly unlikely to be a natural phenomenon: when the probability dips below 1, you can safely call it a negligible chance. In other words, this is manipulation, similar to how repeatedly delivering a NATO top man is considered negligible compared to natural phenomena, according to Wolfram.

Today, I’m taking it easy. There’s an effigy of St. Sebastian I want to visit.


Recently, I joined the Libertarian Party. As a libertine, this somewhat goes against my principles, but I think it’s important to support something that fights for our freedoms and opposes war. That’s why, in these troubling times, I give them my support, along with the more communist-leaning Left Laser. Neither fits me completely, but I don’t consider that very important. What’s important is to counterbalance the Secretive Committee & The Order of the Black Hand.

Germany has issued an arrest warrant for a Ukrainian involved in the Nord Stream explosion.

If you are prepared to blow up the pipeline of your most important ally to escalate a war (and irreparably damage their economy) – how long will the Germans tolerate these manipulations? This information should immediately lead to peace negotiations in any conceivable scenario. The kind of person I hate the most is those who pretend to be ecologically conscious while also catering to the planet-destroying arms industry. It’s completely idiotic, I’m sorry, and it’s also cringeworthily stupid, just like the pipeline explosion or ignoring the probability calculations of either.

‘Can we find a place with a working air conditioner next time we head into a heatwave?’ my daughter asked jokingly. But that barely working air conditioning, that’s Italian, much like the baker’s sleight-of-hand as he swiped the price tag for the tiramisu in a single smooth magician’s move.

The people with upper-middle-class salaries who apparently so eagerly want to sit in judgment over the fairness of how writers are treated—people who come from a completely different class than the writers they judge—even against all odds: if that isn’t a hallmark of a class society, I don’t know what is. I successfully recused Asscher, but had the process continued, I would have asked him a very simple question:

Have you ever had to apply for a literary grant, Mr. Asscher?

A rhetorical question, unfortunately. But more on that later.

Martijn, Venice, 14-08-2024

Post Views: 247
Category: Psychosupersum

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Castles Get Kicked in the Bricks each Summer

Let’s face it: some backpacks just carry your stuff. This one tells your entire life philosophy in one ridiculous, multilingual joke. Imagine strolling into a museum, a bus stop, or your ex's new wedding—with a bag that declares, in ten languages, that castles are always the losers of summer.

Why? Because deep down, you know:

  • Tourists always win.
  • History has a sense of humor.
  • And you, my friend, are not carrying your lunch in just any nylon sack—you’re carrying it in a medieval meltdown on your shoulders.

This backpack says:

  • “I’ve been to four castles, hated three, and got kicked out of one for asking where the dragons were.”
  • “I appreciate heritage sites, but I also think they could use a bit more slapstick.”
  • “I’m cute, I’m moopish, and I will absolutely picnic on your parapet.”

It’s absurd.
It’s philosophical.
It holds snacks.

In short, it’s not just a backpack—it’s a mobile monument to glorious collapse.

And honestly? That’s what summer’s all about.

Philosophy thirts

Feeling surveilled? Alienated by modernity? Accidentally started explaining biopolitics at brunch again? Then it’s time to proudly declare your loyalties (and your exhaustion) with our iconic “I’m with Fuckold” shirt.

This tee is for those who’ve:

  • Said “power is everywhere” in a non-BDSM context.
  • Tried to explain Discipline and Punish to their cat.
  • Secretly suspect the panopticon is just their neighbour with binoculars.

Wearing this shirt is a cry of love, rebellion, and post-structural despair. It says:
“Yes, I’ve read Foucault. No, I will not be okay.”

Stay tuned for more philosophical shirts and backpacks, as we at Benders are working on an entire collection that will make even the ghost of Hegel raise an eyebrow.

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