Buzz off to infinity: a secret letter to Buzz Osborne of the Melvins

Dear Buzz Osborne,

I hope this letter finds you well. As a huge fan of the Melvins, I have always been struck by the raw, abrasive energy of your music and the way it challenges the listener to slumber inside of the box. It was while listening to one of your albums that I had an epiphany: your music and your giant bonushead are in fact the same phenomenon. Both are bold, unapologetic, and completely unique, and it is this fearlessness that makes them so powerful.

I am writing to you today to share with you my book “Poetry to Read in the Dark,” and to explain why I believe you should give it a read. As a buzz poet (if you’ll pardon the pun), I have always been fascinated by the way that hair can be used as a symbol of identity, power, and rebellion. In my book, I explore these themes through a series of poems that are meant to be read in the dark, allowing the reader to fully immerse themselves in the experience.

Bonushead buzzing in poetry

Here are five reasons why I think you should give my book a read:

  1. Uno) Hair as a symbol of individuality: Just as your giant bonushead sets you apart from the crowd, the poems in my book explore the ways in which hair can be used to express one’s individuality and resistance to conformity.
  2. Due) Hair as a source of power: From Samson to Rapunzel, hair has long been associated with strength and power. In my book, I delve into the ways in which hair can be used to assert control and command attention.
  3. Tres) Hair as a form of rebellion: Whether it’s a mohawk or a rainbow-colored dye job, hair can be used to defy societal norms and make a statement. My book celebrates the rebellious spirit that is often associated with unconventional hairstyles.
  4. Quattro) Hair as a marker of identity: Whether we realize it or not, the way we style our hair can say a lot about who we are and where we come from. My book delves into the way that hair can be used to signal cultural and personal identity.
  5. Cinque) Hair as a source of inspiration: From the wild manes of rockstars to the sleek, smooth locks of movie stars, hair has long been a source of inspiration for artists and writers. My book is no exception, and I hope that it will inspire you to think about hair in new and exciting ways.

Buzz, here is my book, I give it to you for free:

Poetry to Read in the Dark (2022) (1136 downloads)

Of course there’s a caveat: the above mentioned hair is just a metaphor. There is hair in the book, but its invisible hair. To some people my words will even be bald.

My challenge to you is to discover how much bonushead can buzz in my poetry.

I hope that you will consider giving my book a read. Thank you for all that you do to push the boundaries of music and inspire others to buzz off to infinity.

Yours truly, Martijn Benders

To internet readers who are unfamiliar with the work of the Melvins, here is their latest masterpiece:

Lord of Bzzzzz

No, no: I am not a 'guru' of some sorts: I'm just a guy that happened to be succesful at fighting of the addictions dystopia had blessed me with.

Now I am devoting my time to helping others as a mycotherapist.

I know a lot about mushrooms and I have devised methods of employing them in your diet that will help your physical and emotional wellbeing.

If you experience problems and you think I might be able to help you, please go to my contact page and let's have a chat.

I wrote a book titled 'Amanita Muscaria: The Book of the Empress'. That book presents 'the big picture', the one you've perhaps been missing out on. It is the story of what really happened with humanity the last 1000 years, and how wild mushrooms came to be demonized, and how Amanita Muscaria/ Fly Agaric can help you regain your true self and at the same time make this planet a better place for everyone.

The book can be bought at regular dutch bookstores and soon at international bookstores too. And to be complete: you can also buy it from me directly using crypto. Just donate an amount of crypto to me that would equal about 33 euros and I will send you a signed copy:

If you want to donate me some crypto to help my cause (fighting the benzodiazepine epedemic) your contribution would also be most welcome.

I am also known as a writer and a poet. As of 2023 I have written about 18 books. Lots of them are available for free from my homepage: I have never been much of a kapitalist, and I believe that good poetry has a healing effect on people.

Drop me a line if you want to ask me something or collaborate on anything. I wish you a great life, and lots of luck and great guidance on the path you are walking.